With Valentine's Day around the corner, love is in the air!
As a church how do we address the issue of Love and not mixed up with Sex.
What about Premarital Sex - How Far is Too Far?
We are surrounded by sex. Sex permeates television, movies, magazines, music and the internet. In some countries, thank God not in Malaysia, sexually charged advertising is plastered on billboards, posters and the sides of buses. It is a matter of time, that our culture is saturated by sexual imagery.
Is it not about time that the Church should put aside its outdated fears and "sweep under the carpet" attitude and deal with the issue of Love and Sex, instead of allowing society to dictate the terms and depths of this sexual behavior phenomena.
On the issue of sex outside of marriage, the bible leaves no room for discussion. In regards to adultery (a married person having sex with a person they are not married to):
“Do not commit adultery.” (Exodus 20:14 NLT)
“Do not commit adultery.” (Deuteronomy 5:18 NLT)
“…And Jesus replied: “Do not murder. Do not commit adultery. Do not steal. Do not testify falsely.” (Matthew 19:18 NLT)
“For the commandments against adultery and murder and stealing and coveting--and any other commandment--are all summed up in this one commandment: "Love your neighbor as yourself.” (Romans 13:9 NLT)
Some Christians have confusion about the bible’s position on premarital sex because of the English words translators have chosen. The Greek word that means sexual intercourse with someone to whom you are not married is translated as “sexual immorality” in many translations and “fornication” in older ones. It would have been much clearer in many cases to translate it as “premarital sex”:
“But our bodies were not made for sexual immorality. They were made for the Lord, and the Lord cares about our bodies.” (1 Corinthians 6:13 NLT)
“Run away from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body.” (1 Corinthians 6:18 NLT)
“So put to death the sinful, earthly things lurking within you. Have nothing to do with sexual sin, impurity, lust, and shameful desires.” (Colossians 3:5 NLT)
“God wants you to be holy, so you should keep clear of all sexual sin.” (1 Thessalonians 4:3 NLT)
Contrary to the demonic lie that society has fallen for; God does not place restrictions on sexual behavior because He is repressive or believes sex to be evil. We are asked to restrict our sexual behavior because of God’s respect for sexuality and concern for us. Our God is a God of wisdom, holiness and love. His commands are always shaped out of His character and there are always reasons behind His commands.
Some would argue: "What could possibly be wrong with two people who love each other becoming physically intimate?"
Let me give you an example:
I do not use my wife’s wedding dress as a rag to clean my car, I do not use the good china to feed the dog, I do not use the company computer as a doorstop and I do not use my bible as scrap paper. Why? Respect. We restrict our behavior out of respect for others and ourselves. Sexual behavior is no exception.
Anytime we decide to ignore God’s commands, we suffer the consequence of it.
By choosing to ignore God’s restrictions on sexual behavior we open ourselves up to: venereal disease, unwanted pregnancy, abortion and unstable home environments for children. With millions dying globally from A.I.D.S. the ramifications of chosen abstinence and sexual purity would be profound. Sexually transmitted diseases could be eliminated entirely within a generation or two.
Sex is not just physical. There are psychological issues and other natural bondings that occurs during sex.
If you love someone, what level of sexual intimacy is acceptable before marriage?
This is the question that many churches and many Christians have failed to properly discuss. The world’s perversion of this holy gift has reached previously unimagined depths. It is important and imperative that parents discuss sex and sexuality with their children. It is imperative that churches discuss what a Christ centered and healthy approach to sex looks like. Whether it is fear or awkwardness or ignorance that has prevented a proper dialogue from taking place we need to reclaim that correct and proper perspective on sexuality as our Lord has always intended.